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Captain Spaceship

“We canna do it, Cap’n!” slurs Lieutenant Rascal (junior grade). “If we leverage any harder, we’ll be unable to capitalize on foregoing objective strategies while remaining mobile in the new marketscape!”

“I need that in English, dammit,” says Captain Spaceship.

“We’re running out of shareholder value and we dinna why!” Rascal’s desperately sweaty on the viewscreen. Behind him, shirtless sublieutenants shovel wads of green paper into the roaring engine.

“Dammit!” says Captain Spaceship. “You’ve got to reduce costs!”

“Aye-aye,” says Rascal. Some of the sublieutenants have already begun whanging other sublieutenants over the head and heaving them into the fire.

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