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Jack

The giant lived, and sued, and won, and now Jack’s living the settlement: five years of indentured servitude.  He plugs mouseholes in the castle walls, chases dust beasts, finds things under the couch.  Once in a while he has to ride a vanishing pat of butter desperately around a hot skillet.

The giant laughs at that, spinning in his enormous motorized scooter.  Jack understands it was the largest single Medicare expenditure in state history.  The gantry supporting his neck was purchased used from NASA.  Things could be worse, Jack supposes:  he could be Mrs. Giant.  Somebody has to change those diapers.

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